Most people live their life based on FEAR.
And If there’s one thing I learned in the 31 years of my short life on Earth, and most recently during these last 3 years: fear can really have us make poor choices !
Let me explain and develop my opinion by giving you some of my own personal experience: 3 years ago, I got ripped-off by a lawyer. I believed him, trusted him and I was scared that bad stuff would happen if I didn’t. Then, almost at the same time and as I was very vulnerable (and of course, financially insecure), I entered a toxic environment where I was brainwashed and morally abused by a ‘guru’ (or should I say a definite asshole). 1 year after that, on my quest for health recovery (post traumatic stress any one ???) ; I was manipulated by a health practitioner (even bigger of an ass… or shall we say sociopath !!!).
Well, If that wasn’t a sign of poor decision making based on poor self-confidence and FEAR… ???!!!
The funny thing? I thought I’d know better than that ! After all, I was the daughter of a manipulative man …
But hey! that’s the journey: We all are on this planet to learn, grow and (re)connect… And make sure not to forget who we are and to take care of ourselves. And when/if we do forget, the Universe makes sure to shake us/wake us up with some good life changing experiences … because that TL (=tender loving) Care for ourselves is where it all needs to start to build the confidence necessary to move onto the next steps in this crazy life…
Yes, sure, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger! And yes, clearly this could happen to anyone … (In fact, I believe that it all happened for a reason…).
Those difficulties/ experiences tought me a lot and most importantly, I learnt the 3 following essential things: 1/ always listen to my GUT feeling ! As Tracey McMillan once said; ‘No red flag is better than in your own gut.’ if it doesn’t talk; it screams ! honour it and listen to it!! 2/ believe that the Universe has got some really good things coming your way… TRUST that !!! 3/ with number 1 and 2 in mind: LET GO of the fear…
The fear of failure, of judgment, of suffering, of change (ooh! that uncontrollable change!)… whatever the reason; fear is always detrimental. let go of it. Accept it as it is because, as buddhists say it: there is only one thing constant in life; change. So if you are scared of it, you will spend your life in fear!!!
Not only does it stop you from doing and experimenting things, going places, meeting people, learning and growing… Down the track, Letting go of fear allows you to live your life happily and freely; and allows you to CONNECT. *(with yourself and others). In confidence.
Where is the limit between being fearless and reckless – you ask ? Well, I am confident in saying that reckless isn’t as positive as it sounds. I used to think that reckless was cool! At some point, I was a bit reckless myself. Experience told me that it was ok to be like that at the age of 20 yo (and with parental support in background ) But once I got older and wanted to become an independent woman (with ‘ my shit together’), that reckless state of mind seemed to be mostly caused by self-sabotage behaviours and beliefs. That, again, comes from poor self esteem or lack of confidence! Believe me, it doesn’t take you to good places …
‘Live a life with no fear’ has a higher meaning in the sense that it is a way to be totally and genuinely oneself without hiding behind a mask or avoiding situations because of fear (of judgement, failure, etc…).
Now I am still me. I am willing to remain excited and spontaneous but not at the cost of my own life or freedom. This is why I am aiming at living a fearless life but not being reckless anymore…
My last piece of advice (to you/myself): stay connected with your true self so to connect with others … and be aware that we are all inter-connected… when everyone understands that, the world will be a much better world. ❤
Thank you for reading this article,
With Love x